Random

its been really long time since i last wrote on my blog..well im just wondering im in what kind of relationship?sometimes i feel that im not in a relationship...last time he use to contact me and of cos i got contact him as well sometimes, but he will contact me more...but this time he contact me lesser and i've been looking for him everyday bcos i miss him..im wondering why he chooses me as a gf? is it bcos of satisfaction?im really confuse myself...sometimes he treat me nice and sometimes he treat me ok...if he doesnt like me in the first place, he should not be together with me.. i really hate this kind of relationship and its something like my ex, but much better than him of cos (way much better than him) is it my fault? im the person that does not like to be sad and being emo...but why is this happening to me again????i really feel like giving up, but i cant bcos i love him and sometimes i pray hard to GOD that he will treat me better..there is one night i dream about him that he was flurting with other girls and i was jealous (wierd dream) its just out of a sudden i dreamt about that..am i such a useless and bad gf in reality??well i think i am...haiz im not sure but i think its my fault and i will try to improve and i really hope that he will treat me better. i think this might sound quite funny to you guys bcos of such a small matter and im feeling sad about it ahahahha but i just write it out bcos im kinda depressed and confused at the moment..